Fear. Pain. Love. Resolve.
American Muslims experienced a wave of emotions on Friday as they awoke to news that a gunman had rushed into two mosques in Christchurch, New Zealand, and started shooting, killing 49 people and wounding many others.
Charles Leffingwell, a resident of Washington, DC, described the news as "crushing."
"It's traumatic for all of the Muslims I know -- everyone is grieving about this," he said.
While attending prayers at his mosque on Friday, Leffingwell braced for the worst.
"I thought on some level something could happen and was expecting to hear gunshots while we prayed," he said.
The scenario Leffingwell imagined was similar to the shooting in Christchurch, which authorities have described as a terror attack. The gunman entered the mosques on the holiest day of the week for Muslims and unleashed a hail of gunfire.
The suspected shooter livestreamed video of the attack. In a manifesto posted online shortly before the attack, he described himself as a white man born in Australia. The document espoused anti-immigrant and anti-Muslim rhetoric, and listed white nationalists who inspired him.
Manar Khalil of Staten Island, New York, said the deadly incident heightened her fears of bigoted attacks, especially as a woman whose headscarf makes her "visibly Muslim."
"I can't stop thinking about how it could happen anywhere and anytime," she said. "I fear for my family and fellow Muslims who have become targets of hate and senseless killings."
us.cnn.com/2019/03/15/us/american-muslims-new-zealand-attack/index.html