There is nothing as embarrassing as being
ignorantly confident in error. You may
have, on one or two instances, be posing
off with some words/phrases, not knowing
you’re deep in the pool of mistake; they’re
non-existing phrases. There could make
you fell terribly bad after crafting out a
‘beautiful’ post around an idea.
Embarrassing? Jaw-dropping ? You do the
job. Use whatever words suits you, my
dear. You’re at liberty! After observing
conversations and reading through piles of
texts, I found out that you, like many
others, could have used these wrong, rather
non-existing phrases: Plumby: Chances are
that you’ve used this word to paint your
friend who has some lump of flesh
attached to his frame. Maybe I would
forgive you because it is “Nigerian English.â€
There is no need adding “y†to plumb when
referring to that friend who has some
fleshy meat glued to his bony structure.
Wrong: George’s girlfriend’s not plumby.
Right: George’s girlfriend’s not chubby/
plumb. Complimentary Card “I’ll send give
him my complimentary card“. That’s a
wrong way to tell someone you’ll give him
your BUSINESS CARD. If you use
complimentary, it means that you’re giving
out a free copy of your product. That
informs why you have “COMPLIMENTARY
COPY,†used as a promotional device by
intellectual property owners. Wrong: I gave
Uche my complimentary card. Right: I gave
Uche my business card. Delta citizen/
indigenes This one has been popularised by
the media but some principalities in high
places say that “indigene†is not an English
word. I was wondering, when I read “Delta
citizens†in the news the other time, if my
state had finally gotten independence and
became a country. Never say: “Delta
citizens†since Delta is not a country or
Delta indigenes. Wrong: Delta state
indigenes/citizens have been largely
peaceful amidst the economic Kung Fu.
Right: Delta state natives have been largely
peaceful amidst the economic Kung Fu.
Poke Nose I know you used to tell your
neighbour not to poke nose into your
affairs again. But unku, it’s actually poke
your nose into your affairs. Wrong: Stop
poke nosing into my affairs, biko! Right:
Don’t poke your nose into my affairs, e jor!
Luxurious Bus Trust me, I heard and used
this confidently while growing up until the
scales fell off my eyes. Nigerians use it to
describe a large bus which can take in
more persons than the normal bus. Wrong:
I took a luxurious Bus to Ikeja on Saturday.
Right: I took a luxury bus to Ikeja today.
Comity of Nation If you’re a politically
inclined person, you know that this is used
in reference to the gathering of nations.
However, that is a wrong judgement of the
phrase. Comity of nation is the respect
countries have for one another. Wrong:
Nigeria is envied in the comity of nations.
Right: Nigeria is envied in the community
of nations. Barbing Salon. No much talk on
this as there is no word as “barbing†in that
context. Wrong: I went to the barbing
salon. Right: I went to the hair salon.
Screen touch In this digital age, you may
have been guilty of using it to describe a
mobile device that responds to touch.
However, that’s wrong. See how to use it:
Wrong: My phone is a screen touch. Right:
My phone is touch screen.
