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“One man’s “magic” is another man’s engineering. “Supernatural” is a null word. – Robert A. Heinlein (Sci-FI writer)

. “A good scientist is a person with original ideas. A good engineer is a person who makes a design that works with as few original ideas as possible. There are no prima donnas in engineering” – Freeman Dyson (theoretical physicist and mathematician). “A good scientist is a person with original ideas. A good engineer is a person who makes a design that works with as few original ideas as possible. There are no prima donnas in engineering” – Freeman Dyson (theoretical physicist and mathematician). “A good scientist is a person with original ideas. A good engineer is a person who makes a design that works with as few original ideas as possible. There are no prima donnas in engineering” – Freeman Dyson (theoretical physicist and mathematician)

What is the president of a woman’s archery tournament
called?
Answer: Lady paramount.
A lady paramount presides over a woman’s archery
tournament. Sometimes the term is also used for a sponsor
of an amateur match.

Ow, my shit! : When I was a kid, I was always excited to learn new vocabulary. When I was in first grade, my teacher taught me that “shin” was another word for leg.
Later that day, I was walking with my mom, when I tripped and hit my leg on the ground really hard. I yelled out “OW, MY SHIN” although my mom heard “OW, MY SHIT.” She started yelling about how that was a bad word and we didn’t say that word, and she was going to wash my mouth out with soap. I was a crying, bawling mess of a child, to the point I was doing that weird cry, stutter, hiccup noise. She paused in berating me and said “Who taught you that word?!” Of course, I told the truth and said “M-m-my teacher t-t-t-taught me that word!” and she started ranting about how she was going to call the school and get that teacher yelled at.

The day my teacher stole my headphones : During my sophomore year of high school, we were doing silent work and my history teacher said that we could listen to music but if it was too loud he would “break our headphones.” so I’m doing my work quietly with my music on low, and this obnoxious kid sitting next to me had his music really loud. I could hear it over my music but ignored it. My teacher thought it was me. So he comes up to me & ripped my BRAND NEW Apple headphones, looking ruthless. He suddenly realized it was the guy next to me and he was completely embarrassed. He came in the next day with a new pair and an apology note taped to them. He couldn’t look me in the eye for the rest of the year.

Drama at my drama class : One time my drama class’s teacher had gone home sick so we were just put in a classroom with a movie to entertain us for the period when an alarm went off. None of us were sure if it was the fire alarm or the lockdown alarm, so we all head out into the hall to check and no one’s out there, so we head back in and climb under our desks as is lockdown procedure. Cut to an hour or so later when a teacher bursts in and nearly dies of relief because the school was on fire and we were the only students not accounted for and half the faculty and fire department had been searching for us for ages. Literally, the whole school had filled with smoke while we’d kept super safe under our wooden desks.

All the fish : I went to this girl’s party the week after she beat the shit out of my friend. While everyone was getting trashed, I went around putting tuna inside all the curtain rods and so like weeks went by and they couldn’t figure out why the house smelled like festering death. They caught me through this video where these guys at the party were singing Beyoncé while I was in the background with a can of tuna.

The fake report card: I failed the first quarter of a class in middle school, so I made a fake report card. I did this every quarter that year. I forgot that they mail home the end-of-year cards, and my mom got it before I could intercept with my fake. She was PISSED—at the school for their error. The teacher also retired that year and had already thrown out his records, so they had to take my mother’s “proof” (the fake ones I made throughout the year) and “correct” the “mistake.” I’ve never told her the truth.

1. Now that’s what I call stupid : In my junior year of high school, this guy asked me on a date. He rented a Redbox movie and made a pizza. We were watching the movie and the oven beeped so the pizza was done. He looked me dead in the eye and said, “This is the worst part.” I then watched this boy open the oven and pull the pizza out with his bare hands, rack and all, screaming at the top of his lungs. We never had a second date.

A school teacher is narrating all the recent incidents that have happened on campus. First, they mention a garden where all the trees died. Pretty soon deaths of all kinds begin to occur.
What Is Great About It: Most of the adults do not know how to deal with death, even though they want to teach children about it. It makes us realize how inefficient our education systems are because they can not help us deal with life’s most basic issues.
Eventually, the students start to lose faith in everything, and the adults have to put on a show of love to make themselves less frightened. It shows the inadequacy of adults to explain and comprehend death, and so they just pretend that they do. In this way, the cycle of misunderstanding and avoiding life’s issues continues on.

A man travels to a freezing, isolated place called Yukon. He only has his dog with him for company. Throughout his journey, he ignores the advice other people had given him and takes his life for granted. Finally, he realizes the real power of nature and how delicate (easily broken) human life actually is.
What Is Great About It: The classic fight between life and death has always fascinated us. Nature is often seen as a powerful force which should be feared and respected. The man in this story is careless and, despite having helpful information, makes the silly mistakes. He takes the power of natural forces too lightly.
The animal is the one who is cautious and sensible in this dangerous situation. By the end, readers wonder who is really intelligent—the man who could not deal with nature or the dog who could survive?

Jack’s mother can make paper animals come to life. In the beginning, Jack loves them and spends hours with his mom. But as soon as he grows up he stops talking to her since she is unable to converse in English.
When his mother tries to talk to him through her creations, he kills them and collects them in a box. After a tragic loss, he finally gets to know her story through a hidden message which he should have read a long time ago.
What Is Great About It: The story is a simple narration that touches on complex issues. It is about leaving your own country with the promise of a better life.
It is also about the conflicts that can occur between families when different cultures and languages collide. In this case, the tension is so high that it destroys the bond between a mother and her son. It also has a moving message about never taking your loved ones for granted.

The Golden Touch



This is the story of a very greedy rich man who chanced upon meeting a fairy. The fairy’s hair was caught in a few tree branches. Realising he had an opportunity to make even more money, he asked for a wish in return for helping the fairy. He said, ’All that I touch should turn to gold’, and his wish was granted by the grateful fairy.

The greedy man rushed home to tell his wife and daughter about his new boon, all the while touching stones and pebbles and converting them into gold. Once he got home, his daughter rushed to greet him. As soon as he bent down to scoop her up in his arms, she turned into a gold statue. He realized his folly and spent the rest of his days searching for the fairy to take away his wish.

Moral of The Story

Greediness will always lead to a downfall.

A Glass of Milk



As Hari walked home after school one day, he suddenly felt faint with hunger and knew his mother would not have any food ready for him at home. He grew desperate and went from house to house asking for food. Finally, a girl gave him a tall glass of milk. When he tried to pay her she refused and sent him on his way. Years later, the girl, now a grown woman, fell very sick and could not find anyone who could cure her. Finally, she went to a large hospital with the city’s greatest doctor. The doctor spent months treating the woman until she was finally cured. The woman was happy but was also afraid she could not pay the bill. When the hospital handed the bill to her, she opened it to read, ‘Paid in full, with a glass of milk’.

Moral of The Story

A good deed never goes unrewarded.

The Fox and The Grapes



A fox was once very hungry and went in search of some food. He searched everywhere, but he couldn’t find anything that he could eat. Finally, with his stomach rumbling, he came upon a farmer’s wall. On top of the wall were the biggest, juiciest grapes the fox had ever seen. The rich purple color told the fox that they were ready to be eaten. The fox jumped high in the air to catch the grapes in his mouth, but he missed. He tried again and missed again. He tried a few more times but missed each time. Finally, the fox decided to go home all the while muttering, ‘I’m sure the grapes were sour anyway’.

Moral of The Story

It’s easy to hate what you can’t have.

The Ant and The Grasshopper



There were two best friends – an ant and a grasshopper. The grasshopper liked to relax the whole day and play his guitar. The ant, however, would work hard all day. He would collect food from all corners of the garden while the grasshopper relaxed, or played his guitar, or slept. The grasshopper would tell the ant to take a break every day, but the ant would refuse and continue his work. Soon, winter came. The days and nights became cold and very few creatures went out. The grasshopper couldn’t find any food and was hungry all the time. However, the ant had enough food for him to last through the winter without any worries at all.

Moral of The Story

Make hay while the sun shines.

Bundle of Sticks



Three neighbors were having troubleThe Crystal Ball
with their crops. All three fields had crops that were wilting and infested with pests. Each day they would try different ideas to help their crops. The first one tried using a scarecrow, the second used pesticides, and the third built a fence on his field, all to no avail. One day, the village head came by and called all three farmers. He gave them each a stick and asked them to break the sticks. The farmers could break them easily. He then gave them a bundle of three sticks and asked them to break it. This time, the farmers struggled to break the sticks. The village head said, ‘Together you are stronger than when you work alone’. The farmers pooled their resources and got rid of the pests in their fields.

Moral of The Story

There is strength in unity.

The Crystal Ball



Nasir found a crystal ball behind a banyan tree in his garden. When the tree old him it would grant him a wish, he thought and thought but could not think of anything he wanted. So he kept the crystal ball in his bag and waited to decide on his wish. Days went by without him making a wish but his best friend saw him looking at the crystal ball. He stole it from Nasir and showed it to everyone in the village. They all asked for palaces and gold but could not ask for more than one wish. In the end, everyone was angry because no one could have everything. They became very unhappy and decided to ask Nasir for help. Nasir wished that everything would become as it once was before the villagers had tried to satisfy their greed. The palaces and gold vanished and the villagers grew happy and content once again.

Moral of The Story

Money and wealth do not bring happiness.

The Tale of The Pencil



Raj was upset because he had done poorly in his English test. His grandmother sat with him and gave him a pencil. A puzzled Raj looked at his grandma and said he didn’t deserve a pencil after his performance in the test. His grandma explained, ‘You can learn a great many things from this pencil because it is just like you. It experiences a painful sharpening, just the way you have experienced the pain of not doing well on your test. However, it will help you be a better student. Just as all the good that comes from the pencil is from within itself, you will also find the strength to overcome this hurdle. And finally, just as this pencil will make its mark on any surface, you too shall leave your mark on anything you choose to’. Raj was immediately consoled and promised himself that he would do better.

Moral of The Story

We all have the strength to be who we wish to be.

When Adversity Knocks



This is a story explaining how adversity is met differently by different people. Asha’s father placed an egg, a potato, and some tea leaves in three separate vessels with boiling water. He asked Asha to keep an eye on the vessels for ten minutes. Once these ten minutes were over , he asked Asha to peel the potato, peel the egg and strain the tea leaves. Asha was left puzzled.

Her father explained , ‘Each of these items was but in the same circumstance of being in a pot of boiling water. See how they’ve responded differently. The potato is now soft, the egg is now hard, and the tea has changed the water itself. We are all like these items. When adversity calls we respond in exactly the way they have. Now are you a potato, an egg or are you tea leaves?’

Moral Of The Story

We can choose how to respond to a difficult situation.

The Milkmaid and Her Pail



Patty the milkmaid had just finished milking her cow and had two full pails of fresh creamy milk. She put both pails on a stick and set off to the market to sell her pails of milk. Along the way she started to think of all the milk in her pails and all the money she would get for them.

‘Once I get the money, I’ll buy a chicken’, she thought. ‘The chicken will lay eggs and I will get more chickens. They’ll all lay eggs and I can sell them for more money. Then I’ll buy the house on the hill and be the envy of everyone in the village. They’ll ask me to sell the chicken farm, but I’ll toss my head like this and refuse’. So saying, Patty, the milkmaid tossed her head and dropped her pails. The milk spilled onto the ground while Patty cried.

Moral of The Story

Do not count your chickens before they hatch.

I sold my phone to buy recharge card.

I sold my flake to buy food.

I sold my DVD to buy a new remote control.

I sold my spoon to buy food 🍲


Laugh away your sorrow.

You can look at a picture for a week
and never think of it again. You can
also look at the picture for a second
and think of it all your life. Joan Miro

"Twenty years from now, you will be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than those you did. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from safe harbor. Catch the wind in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover."

Abide in me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit of itself, except it abide in the vine; no more can ye, except ye abide in me. John 15:4

OPEN HEAVENS DAILY DEVOTIONAL
DATE: FRIDAY 18TH JANUARY 2019

THEME: DIVINELY SATISFIED?

MEMORISE: And having food and raiment let us be therewith content. 1 Timothy 6:8

READ: 1 Timothy 6:6-10
6 But godliness with contentment is great gain.
7 For we brought nothing into this world, and it is certain we can carry nothing out.
8 And having food and raiment let us be therewith content.
9 But they that will be rich fall into temptation and a snare, and into many foolish and hurtful lusts, which drown men in destruction and perdition.
10 For the love of money is the root of all evil: which while some coveted after, they have erred from the faith, and pierced themselves through with many sorrows.

MESSAGE:
Contrary to common belief, satisfaction in life is not a matter of how much you have. Our Lord Jesus Christ said in Luke 12:15:
“…Take heed, and beware of covetousness: for a man's life consisteth not in the abundance of the things which he possesseth.”

In other words, abundant possessions do not guarantee joy, peace and fulfilment in life. The Lord is asking you today, "Are you divinely satisfied? What is your satisfaction in life dependent on?" The reason why a lot of people are never satisfied in life is due to the lack of contentment. In today's memory verse, the Holy Spirit instructs us to be content with having food and clothing. This is a command and not a piece of advice. To measure up to this heavenly standard, we must endeavour to discover what true blessing is and the source of it. Concerning true blessing, Proverbs 10:22 says:
“The blessing of the LORD, it maketh rich, and he addeth no sorrow with it.”

True blessings from the Lord have three characteristics: they bring riches in all ramifications, they are devoid of sorrow and are accompanied with contentment.

Irrespective of what a man has, if he is not content, he will restlessly pursue satisfaction throughout his life time. The Almighty God, in whose image we were created, is a great example to us on contentment. Genesis 1:31-2:22 says:
“And God saw every thing that he had made, and, behold, it was very good. And the evening and the morning were the sixth day. Thus the heavens and the earth were finished, and all the host of them. And on the seventh day God ended his work which he had made; and he rested on the seventh day from all his work which he had made.”

From the scripture above, we learn that God saw everything that He had made as being very good. In other words, God was content with what He had achieved in six days. This divine satisfaction made Him take a rest on the seventh day! We know that God continued His work after He rested on the seventh day because Jesus Christ said in John 5:17b:
“My Father worketh hitherto, and I work.”

The secret behind God resting on the seventh day even though He still had more work to do is not far-fetched: God was content with His achievements. This is why the Bible says in 1 Timothy 6:6:
“But godliness with contentment is great gain.”

This verse shows that one may be godly but not have contentment. Beloved, when we become obsessed with work because we want to acquire more wealth to the detriment of our worship of God and even to the point of harming our body system, then we have fallen into the snare of the devil described in 1 Timothy 6:9. Are you divinely satisfied?

PRAYER POINT:
Father, please grant me the grace to live a life of godliness with contentment.

BIBLE IN ONE YEAR:
Mark 7-8, Isaiah 15:1-16:11

AUTHOR: PASTOR E. A. ADEBOYE

HYMN 7: MY HOPE IS BUILT ON NOTHING LESS

1 My hope is built on nothing less
Than Jesus Christ, my righteousness;
I dare not trust the sweetest frame,
But wholly lean on Jesus’ Name.

Chorus:
On Christ, the solid Rock, I stand;
All other ground is sinking sand,
All other ground is sinking sand.

2 When darkness veils His lovely face,
I rest on His unchanging grace;
In every high and stormy gale,
My anchor holds within the veil.

3 His oath, His covenant, His blood,
Support me in the whelming flood;
When all around my soul gives way,
He then is all my hope and stay.

4 When He shall come with trumpet sound,
Oh, may I then in Him be found;
In Him, my righteousness, alone,
Faultless to stand before the throne.

olalekan2480:"To reach a port we must set sail -
Sail, not tie at anchor
Sail, not drift."

"To reach a port we must set sail -
Sail, not tie at anchor
Sail, not drift."

"They that go down to the sea in ships, that do business in great waters;
These see the works of the LORD, and his wonders in the deep."
― Bible, Psalms 107:23-24

The Proud Rose



Once upon a time there was a rose who was very proud of her beautiful looks. Her only disappointment was that she grew next to an ugly cactus. Every day, the rose would insult the cactus on his looks while the cactus stayed quiet. All the other plants in the garden tried to make the rose see sense, but she was too swayed by her own good looks.

One summer, the well present in the garden grew dry and there was no water for the plants. The rose began to wilt. She saw a sparrow dip her beak into the cactus for some water. Though ashamed, she asked the cactus if she too could have some water. The kind cactus readily agreed and they both got through the tough summer as friends.

Moral of The Story

Never judge someone by the way they look.

Counting Wisely



Akbar once put a question to his court that left everyone puzzled. As they all tried to figure out the answer, Birbal walked and asked what the matter was. And so they told him the question.

‘How many crows are there in the city?’



Birbal immediately smiled, went up to Akbar and announced that the answer to his questions was twenty-one thousand five hundred and twenty-three. When asked how he knew the answer, Birbal replied, ‘Ask your men to count the number of crows. If there are more, then the crows’ relatives from outside the city are visiting them. If there are fewer, then the crows are visiting their relatives outside the city.’ Pleased with the answer, Akbar presented Birbal with a ruby and pearl chain.

Moral of The Story

Having an explanation for your answer is just as important as having an answer.

[size=8pt][/size] The Wet Pants



Ajay was a small boy who loved his school and his schoolmates. One day, as he sat at his desk, he suddenly felt damp and realized he had wet his pants! Mortified, Ajay did not know what to do or say as he knew everyone in class would make fun of him for wetting his pants. He sat at his desk praying for any kind of help. Diksha was carrying water in a jug to water the class plants. As she approached Ajay’s desk, she suddenly tripped and dumped the whole contents of the jug onto his lap. Everyone rushed to help Ajay. The teacher reprimanded Diksha and gave Ajay a spare set of shorts. At the end of the day, Ajay met Diksha on the bus. He asked, ‘You did that on purpose didn’t you?’ Diksha replied, ‘I’ve wet my pants before too.’

Moral of The Story

Help others in need.
The Wet Pants



Ajay was a small boy who loved his school and his schoolmates. One day, as he sat at his desk, he suddenly felt damp and realized he had wet his pants! Mortified, Ajay did not know what to do or say as he knew everyone in class would make fun of him for wetting his pants. He sat at his desk praying for any kind of help. Diksha was carrying water in a jug to water the class plants. As she approached Ajay’s desk, she suddenly tripped and dumped the whole contents of the jug onto his lap. Everyone rushed to help Ajay. The teacher reprimanded Diksha and gave Ajay a spare set of shorts. At the end of the day, Ajay met Diksha on the bus. He asked, ‘You did that on purpose didn’t you?’ Diksha replied, ‘I’ve wet my pants before too.’

Moral of The Story

Help others in need.
The Wet Pants



Ajay was a small boy who loved his school and his schoolmates. One day, as he sat at his desk, he suddenly felt damp and realized he had wet his pants! Mortified, Ajay did not know what to do or say as he knew everyone in class would make fun of him for wetting his pants. He sat at his desk praying for any kind of help. Diksha was carrying water in a jug to water the class plants. As she approached Ajay’s desk, she suddenly tripped and dumped the whole contents of the jug onto his lap. Everyone rushed to help Ajay. The teacher reprimanded Diksha and gave Ajay a spare set of shorts. At the end of the day, Ajay met Diksha on the bus. He asked, ‘You did that on purpose didn’t you?’ Diksha replied, ‘I’ve wet my pants before too.’

Moral of The Story

Help others in need.

The Bear and Two Friends



Two best friends were walking a lonely and dangerous path through a jungle. As the sun began to set, they grew afraid but held on to each other. Suddenly, they saw a bear in their path. One of the boys ran to the nearest tree and climbed it within a jiffy. The other boy did not know how to climb trees by himself so he lay on the ground pretending to be dead. The bear approached the boy on the ground and sniffed around his head. Thinking that the boy was dead, the bear went on its way. The boy on the tree climbed down and asked his friend what had the bear whispered in his ear. He replied, ‘Do not trust friends who do not care for you.’

Moral of The Story

A friend in need is a friend indeed.

The Needle Tree



There were once two brothers who lived on the edge of a forest. The elder brother was very mean to his younger brother and ate up all the food and took all his good clothes. One day, the elder brother went into the forest to find some firewood to sell in the market. As he went around chopping the branches of a tree after tree, he came upon a magical tree. The tree said to him, ‘Oh kind sir, please do not cut my branches. If you spare me, I will give you my golden apples’. The elder brother agreed but was disappointed with the number apples the tree gave him. Greed overcame him, and he threatened to cut the entire trunk if the tree didn’t give him more apples. The magical tree instead showered upon the elder brother hundreds upon hundreds of tiny needles. The elder brother lay on the ground crying in pain as the sun began to lower down the horizon.



The younger brother grew worried and went in search of his elder brother. He found him with hundreds of needles on his skin. He rushed to his brother and removed each needle with painstaking love. After he finished, the elder brother apologised for treating him badly and promised to be better. The tree saw the change in the elder brother’s heart and gave them all the golden apples they could ever need.

Moral Of The Story

It is important to be kind and gracious as it will always be rewarded.

The Boy Who Cried Wolf


There was once a boy whose father one day told him that he is old enough to look after the sheep. Every day he had to take the sheep over the grass fields and watch them as they grazed to become strong sheep with thick wool. The boy was unhappy though. He wanted to run and play, not watch the boring sheep. So, he decided to have some fun instead. He cried ‘Wolf! Wolf!’ until the entire village came running with stones to chase away the wolf before it could eat any of the sheep. Once they saw that there was no wolf, they left muttering under their breath about how the boy was wasting their time and giving them a good fright while at it. The next day, the boy again cried ‘Wolf! Wolf!’ and the villagers again rushed to chase the wolf away.

As the boy laughed at the fright he had caused, the villagers left, some angrier than the others. The third day, as the boy went up a small hill, he suddenly saw a wolf attacking his sheep. He cried as hard as he could, ‘Wolf! Wolf! WOLF!’, but the villagers thought he was trying to fool them again and did not come to rescue the sheep. The little boy lost three sheep that day, all because he cried wolf too many times.



Moral of The Story

Do not make stories up for attention, for no one will help you when you actually need it.